It will be fine, unless you screw up in the manner in which you have the discussion with Jamie.
The issues you are having at present (this week) simply, in my interpretation of your musings, reflect the extent to which you love Jamie, the life you have with him and your daughters, and your determination not to lose that. Nor do you want to lose the other life you have built.
Officially, you appear to have joined the large group of the mere mortals (99.9% of the population) who, unlike your usual pattern, tend to have issues inside their head for a while and often overthink issues much less important than this.
Jamie knows from first hand experience that something major has happened with you sexually. He hasn't blown up over it.
That is to your "advantage".
He gave you permission to look outside your marriage for sexual satisfaction and you, very discretely, and without humiliating him in public, have acted on his invitation . He knows that.
That is not the only thing that has happened since his accident.
The formerly mundane work performance has been replaced with stellar achievement. It transcends Jamie's career and he has seen this first hand. He doesn't appear to resent that, all signs from you are that he is happy about it.
The discussion should not be impossible if you appreciate the value of the cards you hold.
The economic power structure in your marriage changed materially in front of his eyes. Jamie didn't resent it, based on what I have read in your posts here, and in Medium.
I think that means he will also accept this situation. He will be guided by your approach. The key will be how you present it, based on what you want out of your sexual future.
Humans with a strong sex drive appear to crave regular sexual satisfaction and validation. The timeline for you being like this could be 10-20 years, or more. It is abundantly clear that you can't go back to how your sex life was with Jamie before, alone.
Given that he is apparently expecting some of what is to come, and did give permission for you to go outside the marriage for sexual gratification, a conversation that would normally be impossible to have in one go, and without major consequences, could be surprisingly ok. I think you will need to have it well mapped, take the lead, and know within reason what minimum freedoms you require from Jamie going forward.
PS - your Mum is a fantastic resource in this, run a few scenarios by her and seek her advice on them. t helps that she knows Jamie well.
Hi in a sexless marriage interested in chatting or email right now like you I masturbating few times a day Jamesbridges934@gmail.com
Beth,
It will be fine, unless you screw up in the manner in which you have the discussion with Jamie.
The issues you are having at present (this week) simply, in my interpretation of your musings, reflect the extent to which you love Jamie, the life you have with him and your daughters, and your determination not to lose that. Nor do you want to lose the other life you have built.
Officially, you appear to have joined the large group of the mere mortals (99.9% of the population) who, unlike your usual pattern, tend to have issues inside their head for a while and often overthink issues much less important than this.
Jamie knows from first hand experience that something major has happened with you sexually. He hasn't blown up over it.
That is to your "advantage".
He gave you permission to look outside your marriage for sexual satisfaction and you, very discretely, and without humiliating him in public, have acted on his invitation . He knows that.
That is not the only thing that has happened since his accident.
The formerly mundane work performance has been replaced with stellar achievement. It transcends Jamie's career and he has seen this first hand. He doesn't appear to resent that, all signs from you are that he is happy about it.
The discussion should not be impossible if you appreciate the value of the cards you hold.
The economic power structure in your marriage changed materially in front of his eyes. Jamie didn't resent it, based on what I have read in your posts here, and in Medium.
I think that means he will also accept this situation. He will be guided by your approach. The key will be how you present it, based on what you want out of your sexual future.
Humans with a strong sex drive appear to crave regular sexual satisfaction and validation. The timeline for you being like this could be 10-20 years, or more. It is abundantly clear that you can't go back to how your sex life was with Jamie before, alone.
Given that he is apparently expecting some of what is to come, and did give permission for you to go outside the marriage for sexual gratification, a conversation that would normally be impossible to have in one go, and without major consequences, could be surprisingly ok. I think you will need to have it well mapped, take the lead, and know within reason what minimum freedoms you require from Jamie going forward.
Best of luck,
Michael